i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
