Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I think my moral compass just broke
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
