try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
