The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
