Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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