No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Randomize