Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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