She is in my trunk
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
