We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Randomize
