What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
