He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
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