We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize