ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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