let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Randomize
