i already hear my dad disowning me
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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