yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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