i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
