We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize