just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I need to sanitize my soul.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
