her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
