I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize