just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
