is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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