I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize