Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
