tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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