just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
