Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
