just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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