so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Randomize
