After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
