Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
