Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize