gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
