i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
