Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
