Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I can't trust your balls anymore.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
