i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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