there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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