McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Randomize