ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize