She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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