is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
