yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Randomize
