I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
