Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize