yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
