Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
