Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
