im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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